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A Bad Presentation Can Cost You!

Deborah White — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 15:52:54 +0000

A couple of nights ago my Husband and I went out to dinner. It is rare so we consider it quite a treat. I have always had some bug-a-boo’s about going to a restaurant and one stood out boldly the other night so I thought that I would chat about it here today. It is about customer service so you entrepreneur’s will love this. Listen up!

Check out the picture, what do you see on our table? I see a huge mess of “empty containers.” Well let me back up a bit when I tell you why this bothers me. We sat down to dinner where as a woman you will understand when I say, “It’s wonderful to have someone else serve ME food for a change and I don’t have to do the dishes afterwards either.” That was the kind of night I was expecting.

We went to a newer restaurant that has the “look” of MiMi’s but certainly did not resemble the food quality. This is our third visit and last. I ordered a safe bet from the menu that advertised it as their “famous” sizzling platter. The salad came first and then the burger paddy with onions and green peppers with no seasoning (bland) on a sizzling platter. I guess the sizzling platter was the big deal because the food was not. On a third very small plate came the baked potato about three minutes later.

As a female the looks of this plate reminded me of a bunkhouse meal that I would serve someone that doesn’t like food. Strike ONE. I ordered coffee and on the table were creamers in tiny containers sitting in a bowl on the table already. How long we don’t know. Strike TWO. I am a latte kind of person I opened three containers, poured it in and nothing interesting happened to alert me so I continued to drink it. This started the pile of empty containers you see in the picture.

First I received the salad, which had two dressing containers sitting IN my food. Why do servers think that I would want plastic containers that have been Lord knows where sitting in my food? Strike THREE. I added to my pile of containers.

The dinner was served. I asked our server for butter and sour cream and out of his pocket out came a handful of what looked like ½ a teaspoon each of butter in tiny containers. Strike FOUR. He came back with the sour cream in another container that I scooped out myself. Strike FIVE. By the time that I emptied six to eight of the butter containers my Husband was about 25% done with his meal and I needed a nap from the exercise. Strike SIX.

The container pile was huge by this time and the salad plates never were removed and we proceeded to eat with this mess our entire dinner. Strike SEVEN & EIGHT. We just moved them to the side like you do a church camp waiting for the cleanup crew to come and get them at the end of the table.

Come-on-people! There is a rhythm to the timing of serving customers which certainly didn’t happen this night. Yeah restaurant owners please hear me when I say those tiny containers WE have to personally open are not female friendly and neither is the trash that I had to eat with my entire dinner staring at me. How relaxing is that? I could have done better had I stayed at home and certainly had a cleaner area to eat in and not dished out money for the meal to boot!

Entrepreneurs when you think of your customers don’t always think about what might be “convenient” or quickest to serve them but think about your presentation and how your customer feels when they receive what they purchased. I learned a great lesson because I paid attention to that dinner. I have changed some of my presentations and service, how about you?

Make a comment below and tell me your thoughts!

5 Steps to Making or Breaking A Habit

Deborah White — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 00:59:09 +0000

Do you have something you want to change in your life? Then do it. It takes time and focus but you can begin a new habit or break an old annoying one like drinking coffee.

No one really knows how long it takes to make or break a habit. Some say two weeks and some say 21 days.

It is quite variable since it depends on the person, their determination, their focus, and the habit in question.

Here is a biological fact about learning. When you learn something new, the brain creates new synapses or neural pathways. I call them a crevice. It is as if a new road has been laid to reach a physical destination. Once that road is established, it can be used numerous times. Over time, the more it is traveled, the easier it gets to follow, much like a well-worn habit, thus the crevice is made.

On the other hand, breaking a habit resembles tearing up that roadway so you will not reach that destination anymore or filling in the crevice. However, in the brain, that roadway is not completely demolished but now in its place there is a roadblock sign. But in a moment of desperation or a stressful situation, you can roll right over that sign and use the road again. Therefore, breaking a habit is harder than forming one, but not impossible.

Here are five steps that you can follow that I very briefly share to make or break a habit. There is no way to know if it will take you two weeks or three to accomplish your goal, but over time you can affect a change if you keep at it.

Identify the habit – Are you a coffee drinker for example? Then you want to stop drinking coffee. Know what you are working towards clearly, before you get started. It will increase your chances of success.
Do the research – Know what you are up against. How hard is it to stop drinking coffee? What are the resources available to assist you? If you want to be more assertive, learn the traits of an assertive person.
Get help – This can be a behavior therapist, a friend or hire a Life Coach who can hold you accountable for what you are about to do. Therapy can also help with breaking habits as it can teach you to create an alternate way of thinking to avoid returning to old habits instead of just focusing on not doing something. Positive replacement habits might be something such as exercise or meditation.
Prepare – Think ahead of time how you are going to consciously insert your new plan into your schedule. If you don’t want to drink coffee what decaf drink are you going to set out the night before to start you on a different pattern.
Keep at it – If you forget one day, be sure to do it again the next day. Foster building that new pathway. The more you do something, the more it will become second nature and create a new crevice for yourself. As for breaking a habit, practice using daily affirmations where you tell yourself you can quit drinking coffee or whatever other habit you wish to conquer. Say things out loud like I love to experiment with all kinds of decaf drinks and having so much fun doing it. List the reasons why you can do it to boost your confidence too.

If you trying to make a change in your life, use the five steps listed above. Soon, you will be moving on the right track.

Managing Everyday Paper Flow

Deborah White — Wed, 05 Oct 2011 12:00:00 +0000

Managing Everyday Paper Flow

In one of my many jobs before I became Self Employed as a Life Coach, I was a Property Manager. The job that I liked the most and least at the same time was to do an assessment of the apartment with the new tenant and then do a move out with the same person. During the assessment of the apartment the tenant was all smiles and comments about how everything was going well but when it came to the move out and the evaluation of what they had done to the apartment along with the charges that matches their miss management of it then things got a little tough. One time an owner that we had been doing business with purchased a new complex and the first thing that I did was to do an assessment of all of the apartments and their tenants. Each I would send a letter ahead of time to say what hours I would be there to evaluate any repairs or problems that they had had in the past and then to schedule those repairs etc. Each time that I went to a tenant’s apartment I got an ear full of their opinion of Charles and the condition of his apartment. So the day came when it was Charles turn and to my surprise the condition of his home was nothing of the stories I had been hearing all week from his neighbors. You see none of them had actually been in this two bedroom apartment physically but would catch glimpses of it as they passed his door.

I am not going to keep you in suspense any longer, yes Charles was a hoarder. But unlike some he was the most organized hoarder I had ever known to this day. He was very specific in his choices of “collecting.” He collected magazines and newspapers. They were piled in perfect alignment from the floor all the way to the 8 foot ceiling. They were in rows so that only you could walk if you scooted sideways through the channels that he had made from the front door to very specific and important points in the apartment. Yes, the entire two bedroom apartment was filled with paper.

I knocked on the door that day and was greeted by Charles smiling and welcoming me into his home that he had made perfect for what he believed comfortable. It was as if he was proud of all of the work that he had done to make the pillars of paper rise to the sky. As I scooted sideways and followed this man inch by inch, we came to a Y in the road and he motioned for me to go to the right and then to another Y and we went left finding ourselves to my surprise in the kitchen. Reality changed for me about ½ way in and I really thought I might find the Cheshire Cat hanging from one of the pillars asking me if I was Alice in Wonderland. As I was scooting one step after the other side ways I could only think that I had to be very careful not to knock against the pillars of paper because we would surely be buried alive. I wondered how long it would take for someone to come and find me. Somehow I guessed that Charles would find his way out as he did every day.

After we made it to the kitchen I had a sigh of relief that we had made it “somewhere.” I asked for help to make it to the front door and he said sure. I shook his hand and before saying goodbye I politely told him that we were going to move him to another apartment that would suit his needs better and that his pillars of paper would not be able to come with him. He somehow knew by my kindness that my assignment for him was not coming from judgment but to help him move on to a better life. Just to let you know I connected him with some wonderful people that did help him overcome the need to make his world very small and secure by making paper pillars.

You may wonder why I told you this story and not given you hints and tips about managing paper flow, right? Well really I have in a roundabout way telling you of the most extreme paper piles to make you feel better about yours, LOL. But just the same, I will leave you with this one thought for you to ponder upon. I asked Charles how his apartment got that way and he told me that he started with a very small pile of newspapers at the front door and he said “I don’t know how it happened Mrs. White, it just grew.”

Now I leave you with the assignment of having a wonderful day cleaning out your very small pile of papers before they grow too.

Time Managment – The 4 D’s of Time Management

Deborah White — Fri, 30 Sep 2011 11:00:44 +0000

Part Four- The 4 D’s of Time Management

Today we are going to talk about some letters. Most of us look at the letter D and think vitamins but today we will talk about what you need for self-management under four separate D’s.

Let’s jump in:

The first D we want to look at is the word Do.

Not everyone can do all things and certainly someone is not talented in everything. Doing what you like to do is very important because you will feel satisfied when you do it. Also doing what you do well is very confirming. It confirms who you are as a person. It just feels good to do something that you do well. But here is the catch, if you don’t do it then you could fall into procrastination and that is not an easy habit to break.

The second D is Delegate it.

Again if you are not doing what you love it might just take you twice as long to do that project. Who wants to do something longer than they have to? Give the job to someone that is happy to do it. I don’t like to do certain things and the satisfaction of giving it to another capable person that loves doing it, well, we both get a gift don’t we? I get to do something else with my time that I love to do and can do well and they get to do something that they love to do. Win-Win.

The third D is Dump it.

When we talk about getting rid of something we really have to think why we are doing that. Does it replace something else we might do? Does it repeat something that we are already doing? Does it create a bigger mess to deal with if I keep it? I at times work with Senior’s who are downsizing their homes. They don’t know what to keep, give away, store, or just Dump. One of the great things that we do together is to take pictures of items that they are not going to own any more for whatever reason. We take the picture of the item alone or we include the Senior or a family member in the photo with the item. Then we bind the photo’s where one side of the page is the picture and on the right is them writing something about the item and the experience or memory around it. Then we find a home for the item where it will be loved and cherished from hence forward. What a great tribute to our cherished moments that is for me to work with them on this project. It is total joy for me. Be creative. You are not dumping, you are passing on memories. Get rid of your STUFF!

The fourth and final D is Defer it.

This is the difficult one for most people believe it or not. At times more difficult than dumping it. This is why an item or project got in the to-do pile in the first place. I think sometimes people think that if they just don’t see something then it really is not there at all. Kind of like a magic trick. Consider that this D does not even exist if you really want to get things done. You really only have so much time. The bottom line is if you didn’t get it done up and until now you probably will not find the time to do it in the future either. Humm interesting thought right?

Now with all of that information we are still left with four D’s to work with when considering any task. In your average day you can pretty much take these D’s and work your system to get rid of your stuff on your to-do list.

Your last assignment for the month:

Take out your binder and make four pages with one D on each page. During the week write down the projects and to-do’s that come across your day. Write them on the page that best describes this item. Then next week start getting rid of items off of your list so that you can free up some time.

Let me know how many hours you saved this week? What do you plan on doing with this extra time?

Time Management – Where Are You Now?

Deborah White — Mon, 26 Sep 2011 11:00:02 +0000

Part Three-Where are you now?

At this stage now and in your binder you probably have a fairly clear picture of what your vision for your life is. You could call it your ideal life. I hope that you started your three ring binder I mentioned in the last Newsletter. In there should be many gems like what your life would be like if it were exactly as you envisioned it to be. Now, here comes what you might call a tough part. Looking at your life now and what you wrote in your binder, did it look the same, close, or not at all alike? For some people it could be so different that it looks like an entirely different life. Hang in there with me.

Remember we are putting the puzzle together, no need to be overwhelmed. These two different views can be bridged so that they do eventually become the same. Honest.

Now let’s look a bit closer at what others might thing of time management. Have you gone into what we used to call a Stationary Store? I think that probably ages me, but today they call it Office Max or Office Depot. Don’t you just love these stores? I know I can get lost in them very easy and the colors everywhere makes me so happy. Now move down the aisles and get to the daily planners. How many do you see? There are so many different kinds that anyone could get eye socket tired looking at them. So many different views about putting time on paper. Ladies and Gents, effective time management is not about good time-keeping. Effective time management is so much more than that and truly on a deeper level than just jotting down what you want to get done in a calendar.

Ok now we are back to that four letter word that most people don’t want to hear, change. Oh sorry it is a six letter word but they put it in that category just the same. Changes either bit or small is a reality when you want to do something different that works. I am always so amazed with my clients that want a change to happen but they don’t realize that there needs to be a change for that to happen. Interesting but true. All change is achievable and possible. That is why I absolutely love doing what I do. We can do this together. No longer do you have to change on your own and alone. Looking at how your hours are spent is a huge eye opener for most people. But time and time again (sorry I had to do that) the changes, they say, were so worth it.

Assignment:

Get out the three ring binder and a fresh new page. I want you to write down ONE thing that you know has to change, no IF’s AND’s or BUT’s. (Another saying my Mom used to say) Write it down and think about it.

Until next TIME.

Time Management – Knowing Yourself

Deborah White — Mon, 12 Sep 2011 11:00:14 +0000

Knowing yourself is so important that I would say that it is first essential and effective step you can make towards managing time. With so many pressures coming at you everywhere you turn life has become a bit overwhelming don’t you think? Time control gets out of our focus pretty quickly and we find it difficult to find out what is happening to us as we spin around with life’s challenges and changes.

So before you can really begin to look at managing your time the first thing you need to ask yourself is what in the world do you want to get out of life? I know this is a huge question, but in there is the key to actually doing what matters to you. Some would call this visioning but really it is a bigger picture of your life. If you just look at yourself on a minute by minute look you will not see the bigger scope of what is going on and what you really want.

Can you remember when you were a young adult when everything and anything was possible? The possibilities were endless. How did that vision look then? Are the same things that were important to you then important to you now? Have you lost sight of that and need to be reminded? That grand vision of saving the world back then might have been a bit huge but again there are clues in there at that time of your life that are clues to what your vision is today, it just might look a little different.

This might take a bit of work but start a three ring binder to start collecting your thoughts with me will you? As we go through this month I will give you an assignment to write in that binder. When you get done with writing you will have so many clues and wonderful thoughts that it will hold and your vision will become clearer and clearer. It will be like putting a puzzle together piece by piece until the whole picture comes in view.

Here is your assignment:

Get a three ring binder, paper and your favorite pen. You always want to work writing it yourself as it becomes more personal that way. It fires up a whole different part of your brain that is the creative side and not the mechanical side. Another story another day……

Look up the word vision in the dictionary and see what Webster says. That could be your first writing at the top of the page. Then write what your vision actually is for your life.

Ask yourself “What IF” my life were exactly as I want it, what would it be. Write away till you run out of things to write. And until next TIME.

What Is Time Management?

Deborah White — Mon, 05 Sep 2011 11:00:46 +0000

Everyone has the same amount of time in their day. Do you use your time wisely? Do you struggle with the demands of your job? Do you feel that you are missing some of the best times of your life because you just don’t have time to enjoy them?

Out of these three questions I bet that you answered yes to at least one of these and you just feel like, until you get a grip on your time, that life will just slip you by. The pressures and demands of how to use your time could be getting you down in either your home life or your professional life. And the time that you have with your family is just not what you feel that they deserve.

However, don’t worry just yet. Time worries and frustrations are fixable, and it is not as difficult as you think to make some little changes that give you big returns for that effort. It only takes a few small adjustments in the way you use your time to change your life forever and you will be so happy that you did. Even though change does take some time to implement and then stick to your efforts for doing those changes far outweigh what you are experiencing now.

Each newsletter or email you receive from me will include a Tip Top Tip and an article to help you see where you can curb the frustration and struggle that you have with managing your time. Share them with your friends because they need the tips and help also.

Before I leave you today we will start with Part ONE of exploring What Is Time Management. This article is all about learning to managing yourself.

**We all start out with the same 24 hours. Some of us start earlier in the day and some on the other side of the world start when we are ready to go to bed. But all-in-all we work with the same 24 hours. Let me start out first off saying that you cannot manage time but only yourself.

The very first and most effective way to manage your time is to identify the most important things in your life that matters the most to you. Mostly you would be spending your precious time in this area above any other. You will get the most satisfaction out of your life by doing this. All other time investments are not as important as this is.

By spending most of your time effectively and doing what matters most to you is where you will see the most dramatic improvements, but also be prepared that there needs to be some basic changes in your life. To begin in lots of area’s all at one time will defeat your work and your progress in not only giving you more time to work with but not allow you to make the necessary changes that will stick around for a while. Begin slowly at first and when you succeed in that area move onto the next while continuing your success from the first change. Too much too soon can lead you into more frustration and you will want to give up.

My Mom used to say “yard by yard it could be hard, but inch by inch it is a cinch.”

Simple sayings like this pop into my head from time to time and I am sure that after a few months you are going to be saying that Deborah White said this or that and then making these sayings your own after a while. So, until next TIME.

Life Purpose 4 Steps To Start

Deborah L. White — Sat, 20 Aug 2011 00:07:45 +0000

All people seek purpose in their lives. Some know what that is and others don’t have a clue. If you are one of those that don’t know, let me get you started on looking at what that might be. I look at Life Purpose work as some of the most interesting work that I do. It is a wonderful patchwork quilt that when the pieces come together is magnificent as a whole. But if you only have some of the pieces of the quilt it can be frustrating until enough pieces come together for you to start to see your Life Purpose.

Most people think that the only way to express your life purpose is to find a job that you like to do. I think that you would be happier if your job was in alignment with your life purpose but you can actually live your life’s purpose in all areas of your life and work can be a part of it but not all of it. When you look at how you can explore your own life purpose you need to start making lists so you might as well get that 3-ring binder now to collect information. It might take some time at first but trust me very beneficial in the end.

On the first page title it “relationships.” Then list the people in your life and next to their name write what it is about that person that you like. Generally it will be because you are like that person in that area or you want to be like that person in that area.

Second page title it “what do I value most.” Then write down all of the things that you love to have in your life and why that is important to you.

Third page title it “passions.” Write down everything that you just have to do. You wouldn’t mind doing this for hours and it brings you great satisfaction when you do.

Fourth would be titled “gifts.” These are things that you do easily, naturally or instinctively.
You get the idea now title each page and just start writing. Nothing is right, wrong, good or bad but all are a clue to the pieces of your quilt.

When you have 10 or so pages done then take each of these pages individually and number the information on that page from the most to the least in how ever you want to value them. Then when all done put the top 5 of each page on a separate page and look at them to see the link from one to the other.

You will start to see the quilt pieces, the thread that binds them together and your quilt will grow from a lap quilt to a King size bed before long.

Goals Can Be A Tricky Subject

Deborah L. White — Fri, 12 Aug 2011 23:28:17 +0000

Goals is a tricky subject because it takes on so many different aspects when picking just one to work on. The first thing you need to address is to know where you want to go and is it realistic. An example of that is when I decided to lose some weight about 3 years ago.

I started out thinking that I would lose some 10 pounds a month and it would take me two months to get off the 20 pounds I wanted to lose. When I got together with the group that was going to go through the book Lose it for Life by Stephen Arterburn I was made very aware by my buddies that my goal was totally unrealistic. After all I had not done the weight game before.

The surprise was when I realized by going through the book for the summer that my weight was not about the food but it was my relationship with the food, which is for another topic for another day. By the way I did reach my goal by the end of summer, kept it off for 3 years and did it the healthy way with some incredible friends.

So when you look at your goals in anything that you do remember that you need to make that goal a realistic goal. You have a better chance of achieving it if you do.

Funny Story About Getting Things Done

Deborah L. White — Fri, 05 Aug 2011 22:56:01 +0000

It is around my birthday, April 3rd so I thought I would share with you a story about my family and what it was like being a parent that might bring a chuckle to your life. Here is one of my stories, enjoy.

My Son Brian, who is now 35 was up in his room “cleaning.” I had gone up to the room many times to see the progress of the clean-up-job. Each time I went to the room I would see that nothing had been done. This last time however I went to see that the door had been closed. I thought he must have decided to take a nap for all of the “thinking” about cleaning he was doing. So I opened the door very slowly. Out of the corner I saw something go past my face.

Then it registered that it was GI Joe holding onto something as he was sliding down the string across my vision. I had released him from his station on the other side of the door. I followed the string that went through this makeshift house. As I watched GI Joe hang-glide past my face through the door of the house and crash at the back of the house I now realized it was part of “the plan” and Lord knows how long this child was perched behind this door waiting for me to come and release GI Joe for his trip across the room.

As I stood there trying to register what really happened my eye’s began to scan for the child that thought about all of this. He was on the floor looking into the house from a trap door on the side to see GI Joe do his crashing at the back of the house.

I looked now eye to eye and Brian said “Don’t you know Mom, I’m an inventor!” As I nodded my head yes, saying nothing, I closed the door, went down stairs to his Step-Father and said three words. He’s all yours!